Megan Fox, who I’m 90% sure appeared in very bad poetry written by my teenage self in performing arts high school due to my intense obsession with Transformers during a formative year, is writing a poetry collection of her very own! Pretty Boys Are Poisonous will be published by Gallery Books (the same publisher doing Britney Spears’ upcoming memoir) on November 7 and is already available for preorder.
The collection contains over 80 poems, so Fox has been staying busy. I’d be remiss not to point out it’s not the first time Megan Fox has indicated she’s a poetry biSєxual. 
Who can forget the time she went on Watch What Happens Live — my favorite program for finding out wild celebrity stories — and revealed that after an argument with her former husband Brian Austin Green, she…wrote Friedrich Nietzsche poems on his wall with PERMANENT MARKER!!!!! Honestly, that dramatic anecdote alone makes me think she’s perfectly qualified to write a poetry collection. Will it be good? That’s a different question, but I’m rooting for her!
The publisher includes a quote from Fox in its description of the book:
“These poems were written in an attempt to excise the illness that had taken root in me because of my silence. I’ve spent my entire life keeping the secrets of men, my body aches from carrying the weight of their sins. My freedom lives in these pages, and I hope that my words can inspire others to take back their happiness and their idenтιтy by using their voice to illuminate what’s been buried, but not forgotten, in the darkness.”
So basically, we’re getting over 80 poems dragging bad men. I’m listening, Megan!!!! Now I’m just rooting for her to accomplish her 2023 New Year’s resolution of getting a goddamn girlfriend. Maybe becoming a published author is a path toward that. After all, I met my soon-to-be-wife when she was on book tour for her debut novel. I wish the same for Fox. (Some reports suggest she’s back with Machine Gun Kelly, but that sign can’t stop me because I can’t read.)
Pretty Boys Are Poisonous by Megan Fox comes out November 7, making her book a Scorpio, which feels correct.